Now that Halloween’s drawing near, it’s time for everyone to get into the spirit of the holidays. What better way to do than by digging up an old show from the 1990s? For those of you that don’t know, Are You Afraid of the Dark? aired on Nickelodeon from 1992 to 1996.
Despite being a kid’s show, Are You Afraid of the Dark? featured quite a few menacing monsters and terrifying, er, terrorizers! We’re going to rank the top ten creepiest characters from the show - regardless if they were major or minor villains. Turn on your lights and grab your crucifixes, because we’re about to get into some dark stuff.
Dr. Vink
Dr. Vink proves that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder as he showed up too many times to remain consistently scary. Like, at first we thought “oh no, a mad scientist! Whatever shall our young protagonist do?” Then Vink became a chef, an eccentric artist, and a barber. Unless your name is Sweeney Todd, there isn’t a barber on Earth that’s going scare us.
Vink entered the same territory that Freddie Krueger and Jason Voorhees found themselves in - they showed up so often that they stopped being scary and started feeling corny. Still, Vink’s one of the most iconic characters in the series. It felt wrong not to mention him by the end of the day.
Jake The Snake
Speaking of crazy guys associated with hockey, let’s talk about Jake the Snake. Earlier in life, Jake was a mediocre hockey player who wanted nothing more than to be the very best (like no one ever was.) Jake became so desperate that he willingly used an evil hockey stick to enhance his abilities. In return, the stick turned Jake into a reptilian monster - hence the name Jake the Snake.
Jake ranks so low in this article because he’s only a threat if you’re a hockey player. And if you’re a better player than Jake was, you can slap-shoot him in the face with a puck and knock him into a pit! All in all, Jake’s pretty easy to take down. And, in the end, it’s the cursed stick you have to worry about, not its servant.
Zeebo
Want to make a show, game, film, or book instantly scary? Just add clowns and you’re good to go! The clowns don’t even have to be malevolent in any way, shape, or form - Coulrophobia is genuinely that pervasive.
Clowns like Zeebo merely add fuel to the fire; they play on peoples’ irrational fears the way Stevie Wonder plays the piano. The only thing that reduces Zeebo’s scare factor is his potential origin story; is he an embodiment of fear, or is he merely a man in a clown costume? If he’s the latter, then we’re not impressed - we’ve already dealt with plenty of douchebags playing dress up in 2016.
The Crimson Clown
Unlike Zeebo, there’s less ambiguity surrounding the Crimson Clown. Don’t let its harmless appearance fool you - this thing is an evil entity that feeds off peoples’ negative emotions! The Crimson Clown doesn’t hold a ballon to Pennywise, but it’s still terrifying in its own right.
You see, you can’t take down the Crimson Clown with conventional means; go ahead and shoot it, stab it, nuke it (how do you have nuclear weapons?) - none of it will do you any good. Incidentally, the only way to beat the Crimson Clown is to promise to be good.
Gordon Ankers
Well, if we were ranking monsters based on ugliness, Gordon would probably take first place - or rank among the top five at the least. You see, Gordon’s a werewolf, but the budget for his makeup was so low that he looks worse than the average lycanthrope.
Moreover, Gordon had a horrible habit of eating kidnapped pets! Imagine that you have a pet hamster - we’ll call here Lisa - who’s your best friend in the world. One day, you return home and find Lisa missing. After snooping around, you find Lisa’s bow (she has a bow, roll with it) peaking out of a trashcan resting in front of the Anker family’s home. We hope you’re stocked up on silver bullets.
The Silent Servant
Scarecrows always rubbed us the wrong way - that cold, dead expression on their burlap faces has a way of etching itself onto your retinas. Harold from Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark genuinely gave many of us nightmares as children. The same goes for the Silent Servant.
What makes this guy stand out among the reeds, however, is the fact that humans can control him. One of the only things stopping certain people from committing horrendous deeds is the fear of getting caught. The Silent Servant acts as a malevolent middle man - fulfilling the deepest, darkest desires of its master.
Nosferatu
You can’t beat a classic - unless you’re the other three monsters ranked higher in this article. But, even though Nosferatu didn’t take our number one spot, you wouldn’t want to trifle with this bloodsucker unless your name’s Abraham Van Helsing or Hugh Jackman.
During his short time on the show, Nosferatu dealt a lot of damage - sucking the blood of numerous victims and nearly killing the protagonists of his story! Nosferatu might have taken the top spot if he weren’t limited by the sun and bound to his film.
Creature Of Darkness
The Creature of Darkness lacks the same flair that many of the other monsters in this article has - his name is less of a proper title and more of a job description. But the COD more than makes up for its shortcomings with brutal efficiency!
The COD, like the Crimson Clown, can’t be killed by normal means - he’s more of a ghostly apparition than a physical being. However, you can’t beat the COD by swearing to be a good person. To beat the Creature, you have to partake in a complicated ritual that may or may not work. Good luck!
The Corpse
Much like the Creature of Darkness, the Corpse isn’t one for theatricality (or deception.) The Corpse has no sense for such things - instead, it’d prefer to relentlessly stalk you and rend the flesh from your bones once it catches you.
Physically, the Corpse is easily the scariest looking monster on the show. Despite appearing on a kid’s show, the Corpse appears to be covered in blood and gore! This thing pushed the envelope and fell right into the dark recesses of our minds.
The Demon
The Corpse might be the scariest looking monster, but the demon takes the cake conceptually. Most of the other villains in this list can only hurt you in a limited number of the ways. The Demon, however, can take your soul and trap you for all eternity!
Furthermore, the Demon is nigh-invulnerable and seems to possess reality-bending powers! It’s the closest thing to a Lovecraftian horror that we ever encountered on the show, but that’s one too many by our count!
